Performance pirate

“Well I like to dress like a pirate. That counts for something, right?”

“Counts for nothing. You gonna tell me the story or am I gonna beat the story outta you?” Jimmy began taking off his white jacket, revealing a white shirt underneath.

“What if I told you a joke?”

Jimmy froze, his jacket halfway off. “Then if it’s any good, I’ll be laughing as I punch you, but I usually laugh when I punch people. It’s my thing.”

“Good for you. They say the man who knows himself knows how best to live his life. So, hey, what did the ocean say to the pirate?”

Jimmy stood up, tossed his jacket to the floor and turned his hat around again. “I dunno, something ‘bout eyepatches I guess?”

“No. It didn’t say anything, it just waved.”

“But it ain’t got no arms to wave with.”

“Neither do I, actually.”

“What?”